First Hit #1: December 2, 2006
Putting profanity in the title of a song is an instant way to get attention, especially if you’re planning to release it as a single. It’s so shocking, Akon is not only saying Fuck, but he puts it in the title of the song! Also he will not shut up about being a convict, to the point where I really hope it’s for a boring crime like tax evasion – he claims auto theft, but there’s some dispute there. But I Wanna Fuck You is not going to get radio play, no matter how many times Akon says Convict, so we get the bowlderized version, which censors the word “hotel”, possibly because Snoop Dogg put the emphasis on “ho.”
In fact, entire lines get tossed and others lose all meaning, leading to a song that is perched at the crossroads of dirty and weirdly innocent. You can imagine the lyrics, maybe they’re unspeakably filthy, or maybe they’re actually nice. It’s all in the power of your imagination! Without those lines, it’s just a bit of boring R&B with a bit too much autotune. It’s the era when people started to use the pitch correction software as an instrument of its own again, because Cher’s Believe suddenly became a bit nostalgic I suppose, and Akon isn’t shy about the fact that he’s digitally altering his voice until it resembles a particularly talented computer – he’s not as bad as T-Pain, who turns up in the future, but it still wipes out most of the character of his voice. He’s more concerned with street cred with songwriting, which leads to a single that’s more concerned with the shock value of some light swearing than it is with actually being coherent or all that interesting.